


Jumping Off Cliffs

by WolfAndHound_Archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, First Time, Marauders' Era, Smut, porn without plot/plot what plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-05
Updated: 2016-02-05
Packaged: 2018-05-18 09:58:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5924134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfAndHound_Archivist/pseuds/WolfAndHound_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Against his better judgment, Remus gives in to his desires.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jumping Off Cliffs

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Lassenia, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Wolf and Hound](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Wolf_and_Hound), which was created to make stories posted to the Sirius_Black_and_Remus_Lupin Yahoo! mailing list easier to find. However, even though I still love the fandom, I am no longer active in it and do not have the time to maintain it. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in December 2015. I posted an announcement with Open Doors, but we may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on the [Wolf and Hound collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/wolfandhound/profile).

Hard, retching coughs coated with phlegm and toothpaste were the prelude to a minty spew dappling the mirror, the sink, his hand, and every other surface within two feet in front of him.

“Alright there, Moony?” Sirius’ voice, echoing across the tiled bathroom, registered concern. 

Still rasping slightly, the werewolf responded. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just went down the wrong way.” Well, that’s what happens when you nearly swallow your own toothbrush.

“You know, that implement in your hand is meant for brushing your teeth, not your tonsils.” Sirius observed helpfully. 

‘Right, and it’s your bloody fault I nearly shoved it down my throat,’ Remus thought sourly. Out loud he said, “Very funny. I chose the wrong moment to inhale, that’s all!” He wiped up the mess he had made, trying in vain not to use the mirror to drool at the sight of Sirius’ tantalizing, naked body, still dripping from the shower. 

Boy, he looked good. Skin still slightly tanned from the summer, the seventeen year-old was all long muscular limbs, and thick, black hair, wet at the ends, dripping onto his nicely balanced shoulders. Lucky droplets, Remus mused, watching some run through the light dusting of fine black chest hair. The hair funneled into an enticing trail that spilled down across the flat stomach, swirled around a delectable navel, and flowed on across tight abs to pool into a dark delta at his groin. Which promptly vanished behind one of the thick Hogwarts towels. Inwardly, Remus groaned, feeling a flood of heat in his own lower parts. And moisture on his chin. Good Lord, he **was** drooling!

With a strangled moan, he turned the faucets on full blast and, bending over the sink, scooped handfuls of cool water to throw into his face. After he felt he’d regained his control, Remus stood upright, only to find Sirius standing right behind him.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” The startling pale eyes, full of a puzzled worry, stared into the mirror, into Remus’ reflected hazel. 

Remus stared back. Sirius’ eyes had a unique way of suddenly fastening on you when you held his entire attention. His expression didn’t change; not a muscle in his face moved. It was the quality of his stare that altered, like a microscope being brought into focus. It was as if you put your hand into what looked like a clear pond, only to find yourself pushing through a thin sheet of ice, creating sharp, visible shards. It was unnerving. And he was doing it now.

“Am I okay?” Remus repeated, rather stupidly. ‘How do I answer that, when I can feel the heat from his shower radiating off his body? When, if I turn to face him, I’ll be close enough to put my arms around him? When he’s standing there wearing only a towel?’

“I’m fine.” Remus smiled, lying through his teeth. 

A black browed arched. Sirius wasn’t buying it. “Right, and I hope Slytherin wins the House Cup.”

Maybe he should tell him. Finally admit it. Admit what’s been on his mind for months, ever since they returned to school. Admit that his feelings of friendship for his raven-haired companion had evolved into something much deeper. Admit that he lusted day and night to wrap himself around Sirius’ body, kiss him until their lips screamed, and fuck him legless in any and every position and location their imaginative brains could devise. Admit that his emotions swelled, his heart filled to bursting with a depth and strength beyond anything he’d ever known before. Admit that he was totally, irrevocably in love. 

Remus turned slowly until he was facing his friend. He looked him in the eye, took a deep breath and slowly reached up with one hand. Sirius’ lips parted slightly and his expression shuttered, hiding his feelings. But, he didn’t move away. Remus’ agile fingers plucked up a bit of towel fuzz. “You’ve got thread in your hair.”

Sirius stepped back. “Oh. Thanks.” His gaze dropped and suddenly he seemed uncertain and hesitant. “Guess I should go put some clothes on,” he mumbled. He walked to the door of the bathroom, obviously heading towards their dorm. Remus never took his eyes off him. Sirius stopped suddenly, glancing back. Their eyes locked. “Um, Remus?”

“Yes?” Remus could barely breathe out the word through the constriction in his chest.

Sirius bit his lower lip briefly, his eyes smoky clouds. “Nothing. Never mind.” He left.

Remus stood for a long moment in the grip of painful indecision. Do something. Go talk to him. Let it go. Forget it. Don’t ruin what you have.

No. No. Remus headed for the door. For once in his life, he was not going to smother his emotions. He was not going to act calm and controlled when he was anything but. He was not going to hide. He flew up the stairs and burst into the dorm room. Startled, Sirius spun around to face him, wearing still-unzipped blue jeans and holding a shirt in one hand. Remus closed the door and leaned against it, his heavy gaze traveling slowly from Sirius’ face down to his bare feet and back again. 

He pushed himself away from the door and stalked across the room, moving inexorably towards a future that would be either blessed or cursed. He’d know soon enough. His smoldering eyes, wolf eyes, Moony eyes, ensnared his prey. Sirius watched him approach, his only movement the rise and fall of his chest in short, shallow breaths. Remus opened his mouth to say something, but his words fled. For one last second he stood poised at the edge of the cliff. And then he jumped off.

Grabbing Sirius by the shoulders, Remus propelled him backwards, up against the wall. Then he pressed tight against him, his mouth fastened hard on Sirius’, seizing his lips and tongue in a searing, breath-stealing kiss. His hands slid down the bare arms to clasp the slender wrists firmly. Sirius moved against him and Remus responded by raising the captured arms over his head, pinning them against the stone wall, shifting his stance to keep the taller boy trapped and motionless. Their mouths parted, and Sirius gasped, “Remus…” But Remus stopped his words with a new assault.

h, God, he tasted so good, like wine and leather and autumn and all things Sirius. Remus breathed a whimpering sigh into the luscious, open mouth he savored. His tongue darted and swirled, seeking to mine every treasure, every drop of sweet nectar it could find. And his heart sang praises to everything holy, because, unbelievably, Sirius was kissing him back. Remus heard him, felt him moan in a low, husky sound that jolted his already hot passions to new heights. Remus growled in response, mumbling half-formed words against Sirius’ lips. His hands released their grip so that they could travel up and down Sirius’ flesh, all warm and smooth and yielding. Sirius’ arms wrapped around him, pulling him even closer. The taut bulge of his erection bumped against Sirius’ own. Remus leaned into it, his hips undulating in a slow, feral rhythm that felt entirely right. 

It was enough to force a primal, savage groan from the depths of Sirius’ body, from someplace mysterious and unexplored. It was a sound Remus had never heard before and it excited him almost beyond bearing. Breaking the kiss, Remus stared at his friend and saw his own desire reflected back at him. Once more, Remus grabbed him by the shoulders. Pulling Sirius fiercely away from the wall, Remus half-pushed, half-tossed him onto his bed. 

Pouncing on top of the prone figure, Remus’ fingers slid into the damp hair, holding Sirius’ head still so he could ravage that mouth again. He felt hands wriggling between their straining bodies, seeking to undo his pants. Pausing for mere moments to strip off the constricting clothing, both boys tumbled wordlessly back down onto the bed. Wordlessly, but with their lungs working like bellows, as if there wasn’t enough air in the room for them. Remus’ hand now scrabbled at the nightstand drawer, frantically searching for the tube of lubricant. All the while every single nerve in his body screamed with maddened lust and hunger, on fire against the firm flesh of his quarry.

His hand wandered between the firm thighs beneath him, thighs that were already spread wide to receive him. His slick index finger probed delicately, teasing the puckered opening. Sirius’ hips arched toward the finger, seeking it, wanting it. Remus pushed, his finger sliding into its destination as easily as his tongue slid into the eager mouth below him. With a gasping moan of surprise and pleasure, Remus locked onto the swollen lips once more, drawing taste and smell from Sirius, drawing the very oxygen from his lungs deep into himself.

Two fingers now explored, dancing in a twisting, tender attack that made the entire beautiful body under him writhe and squirm against him. He felt their full, hard cocks trapped between their bodies, rubbing against each other with a delicious warm friction. Remus slid his fingers free and heard Sirius whine at the loss of contact, felt him arch forcefully upward, seeking him. Sirius wanted him. Remus felt a heady surge of power, knowing that for this instant, at least, Sirius was his and no one else’s. A guttural growl curled from his lips as he positioned himself, his aching cock easing into the path his fingers opened. “Want you…” he moaned.

“Yes…” his lover answered.

With a hard thrust, he was home, buried to the hilt in exquisite hot silk, tight and smooth around him. It took his breath away and he froze, wanting to brand that indescribable feeling into his brain. Slender fingers threaded through his hair, drawing his head down into another long, wet kiss. Remus rocked back and forth, seeking the best angle. He knew he found it when Sirius groaned out his need, and pushed up into him. Remus pulled back and drove in again. And again. And again. And he rode forward, harder and faster, feeling his body, his heart, his mind swept uncontrollably up the crest of a tidal wave, where he balanced precariously until, with a triumphant shout, all the power and glory burst out of him, hot and long and deep, into his heart’s desire. 

Remus collapsed breathlessly atop Sirius, feeling warm liquid erupt from the cock still caught between them. Remus’ hands clutched at Sirius’ shoulders, as they both gasped for air. Gradually the shattered mosaic of Remus’ thoughts began to reassemble itself. And with his returning clarity came a feeling of absolute dread. ‘What have I done?’

Guilt overwhelmed him. Not because he had forced Sirius into anything - he didn’t think he had. But, guilt over how their actions might affect their friendship. Remus still hadn’t expressed his feelings. He had simply been swept off his feet by a frenzied lust. 

Embarrassed, he sat up, turning so he’d only see Sirius if he glanced back over his shoulder. He couldn’t decide what to do. He wanted to say something, yet at the same time he had an almost overwhelming urge to run from the room.

“Remus?” Sirius murmured, his hand sliding tenderly up Remus’ back. “Remus, are you okay?”

“Is that all you can ask me today?” Remus snapped, jerking away from the touch, but still not daring to look into the crystalline gray eyes. He felt Sirius change position, sit up, and draw away from him. ‘Of course,’ Remus thought with angry despair. ‘I’ve ruined everything.’ He should have realized giving in to his desires was a mistake. 

“I…I don’t understand.” Sirius’ voice was low and unsteady. 

“What’s to understand?! We felt like fucking, so that’s what we did! Considering all the beds you’ve slept in, surely you can grasp that concept!” Part of Remus’ mind reeled. ‘What are you saying, you idiot?’

There was dead silence in the room. Sirius drew in a deep, audible breath. “I see. You’re number came up today in the Gryffindor Slut Sweepstakes, is that it? Wanted to take you turn on the carnival ride?” The bitterness in his voice was unmistakable.

Remus was horrified. Surely Sirius realized that he didn’t think of him like that. ‘Well, what’s he supposed to think? Look how you’re treating him.’ He opened his mouth to try to explain and said, “I…I should get dressed.”

Wincing at his floundering inability to handle the situation, Remus rose from the bed and gathered up his clothes. Turning to walk away, he suddenly stopped. He realized what he had to do. He had thought that turning his desire loose was like jumping off a cliff. He had jumped off the cliffs of Dover. But, now, if he meant to rescue anything, if he wanted to keep Sirius as a friend, and if he hoped to have a chance in hell to keep him as a lover, he had to jump off Everest. 

Remus glanced back at Sirius. He hadn’t moved. The handsome face was turned away, the mane of black hair tousled. The fingers of his hand gripped the bedspread in a tight fist. 

Slowly, Remus moved back to the bed. “Sirius?” He said uncertainly.

With a toss of his head, Sirius shook the hair back off his face, and turned to look directly at Remus, making no attempt to hide the hurt in his eyes. 

“Well? Spit it out, Remus! What else do you have to say to me?”

The clothes dropped in a heap from Remus’ hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. I’m a moron. And I love you.”

Sirius stared at him as if he’d gone quite insane. Remus slowly sat on the bed, never taking his eyes off Sirius. He waited, knowing that Sirius’ next words would either be his salvation or his execution. 

“I thought that’s what you said before. But, then I figured it was your hormones talking and I shouldn’t get my hopes up.”

Now it was Remus’ turn to look quizzical. “What I said before? When?”

A small smile tipped up the corners of Sirius’ mouth. “Before, when you had me pinned to the wall.”

“Oh.” Then the true sense of what Sirius had said finally knocked loudly on the door to Remus’ brain. “Wait. You didn’t want to get your hopes up? What do you mean?”

Sirius sinuously twisted himself around to slide under the covers of the bed. “It’s cold sitting around naked.” He raised the bedclothes. “Would you rather discuss this where it’s warm?”

With an embarrassed grin, Remus slid next to him. Before he settled down, he reached up to close the bed curtains. Then, lying next to Sirius, he repeated his question. Sirius’ smile turned rather sheepish. “Well, I love you, too. I have for ages. I just didn’t have the balls to tell you. I was afraid I’d drive you away. And I didn’t want to risk losing you as a friend.”

Remus grinned. “Me, too! God, we’re both idiots! I feel so much better!”

Laughing, Sirius raised his hand to Remus’ face. His agile fingers traced along the curve of Remus’ cheek and brushed gently across his lips. Remus lay still under the soothing touch, staring into the diamond-bright eyes that regarded him with that singular intensity only Sirius had. But, now there was a totally new expression in them, one that warmed Remus to the depths of his soul. “Remus, you’re so very beautiful.”

Remus smiled at him. “Beautiful enough to kiss?”

“Oh, yeah.” 

Remus pulled him close for a long, sweet kiss. He had the feeling they weren’t going to leave the bed anytime soon. 

Suddenly they heard the room to the door open and several sets of footsteps enter. Then Peter Pettigrew’s voice whispered hoarsely. “James, I thought you said Sirius had gotten up to go take a shower. Did you actually see him get his skinny arse out of bed?”

“Yes. And he promised he was going to check on that Herbology experiment.”

Sirius spoke up. “I was waylaid on my way back from the shower.”

“Well, get up, you lazy sod!” James Potter’s voice rang through the room. Footsteps approached the bed. “Or do we have to drag you out of bed?”

“I’m not alone in here,” Sirius warned. Remus snickered audibly. “I’ll check those bloody plants later.”

The silence of the truly perplexed enveloped the room. Then, two sets of footsteps walked slowly back towards the door. “James,” Peter hissed. “That **is** Remus’ shirt on the floor, isn’t it?”

Remus and Sirius tried unsuccessfully to smother their laughter. Remus called out merrily, “Yes, it’s my shirt. And Sirius’ arse isn’t skinny. It’s actually quite attractive. But, you’ll have to take my word for it, because if you dare put your hands on him, I’ll break all your fingers!”

A long-suffering sigh filled the air. “Come on, Peter. Let’s leave them alone.”

END


End file.
